My love/hate relationship with running

OK, I have no idea who is looking at my blog, but I see the ticker going up lots and lots, so please feel free to follow my blog, or comment!!! I'd love to know I'm not alone in this mommy-running world!!!!

Now, onto my love/hate relationship with running. I love to run. I obsess over it. I dream about running. I am a fanatic over deciding which races to run. I am lost without a big race to train for. I can't stop thinking about what's next in my running world.......
But, the second I am out there, the very second after I hit "start" on my uuber-old-school Timex, I hate running. I hate the pain. I hate that I can't run faster. I hate that my thighs still jiggle, even after all this work I make them do. I hate that m"J-Lo-aint-got-nothing-on-me" booty wiggles AND jiggles. I hate that I've left my hubby and kids at home to go run. I hate that all these people are out mowing their yards or working in their gardens, and I have forfeited this time for Chris and myself, because I choose to run. I hate that I am only 2.3 miles into my 4.6 mile run. I hate that I'll never be able to complete the 1/2 marathon in my goal time. I hate that I have scheduled my families activities around my running. I hate that this little hobby costs $15-$18 per race. I hate that I'm not done yet. I hate that I hate this.
Then I finish today's run. I hit 'stop' on the ole Timex. I LOVE RUNNING! I love what I just accomplished. I love that I am setting such a great example for my children. I love the people in my town who smile and refer to me as "the runner" I love coming home a putting a big fat "X" on today's scheduled run, because I did it! I love plugging today's numbers into my online pace calculator, and seeing I shaved 8 seconds off my last run. I love inspiring others to lead a more healthy lifestyle. I love the slight soreness in my thighs after a long run. I love walking around after a LONG Saturday morning run, knowing I've done more before 7am than most people. I love feeling like I 'earned' my Coke after a good run. I love feeling my legs get stronger every day. I love running. I LOVE RUNNING. (most of the time anyways)

Ramp Run...... April 24, 2010

This is us after the race.... he gets his typical first place, and I am in second... AGAIN!!! will I ever beat him?????

OK.... let's DO THIS!!!!!!!!!

Saturday, April 24, 2010. 9 am. Some moron out there decided it would be great to do a 5K around Purdue's campus and throw a 5 level parking garage ramp run in the middle of it! And we PAID them to let us do it!!!!! We left the older 3 children at my moms for a sleepover, and brought Jill with us, Jackie was willing to push the stroller around while we did the race.... THANK YOU JACKIE! After packet pick-up, including the worst ever 'running gloves', we walked around for a while, and *gasp* NO port-a-potty's!!! We were able to use the bathrooms in a building. With plumbing!!! and sinks, and soap!!!

I was really nervous about this particular race, because in the week prior to it, my gramma died. I had a miserable week with the viewing, the burial, and the depression! I had only gone for 1 run, and it was a piddly 2 miles, and it felt awful. I hated being alone with myself, and I hated that I was mad at God. I use my runs as my me time. My time with God. I pray, I reflect, I ponder, I worry, and I pray some more. That run was awful, because I refused to talk to God. I was mad, I was angry, I was furious. It wasn't fair. I love my gramma so much. I can't bear to think that I never get to see her again. It's not fair. She was fine. She wasn't sick. She went into the hospital with severe stomach pains, and was with God less than 24 hours later. It's not fair. I need my gramma here. There's still lots left to talk about, lots to do. It's not fair.

So, this particular race is bittersweet. I feel bad getting back to my 'normal' life so soon. I know my gramma thinks I'm ridiculous, I can feel her rolling her eyes and giving that little laugh that really means "Oh, Julie, you're so silly" So, I run anyways. The race begins innocently enough. This race had NO crowd support. Seriously, NO crowd support. I've never been in a race where the only non-runners you see are holding signs, or pointing which way to go. The first mile was actually painful. It hurt, everything hurt. Chris was only about 15-20 feet ahead of me, and kept glancing back at me. I think he was worried about my mind for me, he's so sweet! I'd be lost in this big ole world without that man! Just past the 2 mile, I could see the dreaded parking garage come into view. I had been pretty worried about this, because I live in flat-land -- there is nowhere to do hill training out here!!! Turns out, the parking garage was nothing..... it's all pretty gradual hills, 2 uphill ramps per level.... I was actually gaining on people on the uphill, I decided I was gonna pick off one person per level... and I did!!! There were only 2 people between me and Chris when I got to the top! Turns out, I am a wimp on the downhills though!!! I have heard so many horror stories about downhill falls, I went into mommy runner here, and went very s-l-o-w-l-y down those ramps! Shortly after exiting the garage there was a 1/2 mile to go sign!!! Wow, that was fast! Then, the cramp hit! I normally drink 2 20oz bottles of water about 2-3 hours before any race. Not today! I only had 1 water before I had my Coke. I guess it was a little dehydration cramp kicking in, it sure did make that last 1/2 mile slow and rough. It was really sad to see Chris's shirt get further and further away!!! The second I crossed the finish I went straight to the water table and chugged some water, within minutes my cramp was gone. Whew!!!

We both PR'ed (although, I have a sneaking suspicion this was NOT a 3.1 mile course) Chris finished in 26:42, I finished in 27:21..... and I placed in my age group!!! I got 2nd place in the 30-34 women, and got an award!!!! Poor Chris, he beats me by 39 seconds, and gets nothing :-( His age group is just full of such quick competition!!!

April 3, 2010....... Ringing in Spring 2010

Ringing in Spring in Valpo, IN will always have a special place in my heart.... It was my first race, it's one of the biggest in the area, it's a relatively flat, easy course... and the crowd support is amazing for the type of race it is!!!
This year, I had my hubby, AND my sister doing it with me!!! I had corrupted Chris into the 5K world, and Jackie got sucked in somewhere along the way. Poor Jackie struggles to run/walk with severe shin splints, so she opted to run/walk this one. I was so very proud of her for all the hard work and effort she put into training for this, she is really dedicated, and it is truly inspiring to me!!! There were lots of times where I absolutely did NOT want to go out for a run, but just then, the running gods would smile down on me, b/c I would get a text from her telling me she had just run .75 miles!!!!! So, I'd get off my lazy, procrastinating hiney -- and go for a run.
We all met at Wal-Mart b/c parking over by the race is insane.... we actually parked at the high school and hopped on a shuttle to the race.... with all 4 kids in tow. After dropping the kids off at kiddie care, we had a good 30 minutes to get nervous, and cold. It was freezing!! No, really, i think it was actually at freezing. It was also really windy and wet -- it hadn't started raining yet, but the skies were gonna open up soon!!!! We all walked around for a bit trying to get out of the cold wind, peeking through windows to check on the kids, and making the mandatory 17 port-a-potty stops......
Then Mr. Ringing In Spring Announcer guy started talking in his bullhorn thing, but the wind was blowing the wrong way, so we barely heard what he actually said..... and then DING (the bell) we were off.....
I ran with Jackie for the first 4-5 minutes, then she choose to walk! She is a strong runner, she just doesn't know it yet!!! The girl has more determination than I do.... she just lets her psyche get in the way!!!
After Jackie began to walk, I made it a mission to catch up to Mr Hotness (that's Chris ~~ the hubby) After a few minutes of running, it started to rain.... but as it started to rain, the wind died down.... thank goodness!!!! About the 1 mile ,mark, I could see Chris up ahead of me --- probably only 10-15 yards ahead of me....I kept pace with him through the ENTIRE race, just barely behind him, but I knew if I passed him, his pride would kick into overdrive and he would hammer down past me, so I planned to keep a little in the reserve tank to fly past him in the end. Just before the 3 mile mark, I started to make my move...... this was gonna be so fun! Chris has a habit of flying past me at the very end of races (not like either one of us care, it's all in fun!!) so I was about to get my piece of the victory pie!
At the 3, I caught up to him, and we chatted for a mere 2 seconds, then I tried to pass him..... GURRRRR, some guy hopped right in front of me!!! And, a lady was beside him! So, to get around them, I had to pass 2 people, and that stinking Chris wound up beating me AGAIN!!!!!
***SIGH**** I guess there's always the next race.....
Chris finished in 29:07 and I came in at 29:10. (next year baby, next year)

Monumental Marathon, Indianapolis

Well, the next logical step after a 5 mile run is, of course, the half-marathon......... did I just say a HALF-MARATHON????? 13.1 miles. all at once? I had 6 weeks to go from 5 miles to 13.1 miles. wow. Chris opted to not do this one with me, he's much more real with himself than I am, I was convinced I could do it, and do it inside of my own goal time too. I tried the rational increase of 1 mile every Saturday up until race day. The Saturday before the 1/2, I was very sick with some cold/flu thing that kept me from running for the entire week! So, I went into the 1/2 having not run in 8 days, and having not had a long run in over 2 weeks!!! (YOWSERS!) We had a hard time arranging babysitters for all the kids, and I had a tremendous amount of guilt and concern involving the kids. We had to leave our house at 3am for this whole shin-dig. A very nervous Julie (and proud Chris) were on our way. To the biggest obstacle of my life thus far. No really, growing, laboring, and delivering children is easy. Running 13.1 miles is not. The Monumental Marathon in Indy is VERY well organized. The whole packet-pick up was quick and painless. We were left with lots of time for my pre-race nerves to go into overdrive. After a self-guided tour of immediate downtown Indy, and 17 port-a-potty stops, it was time to line up. I lined up with the 10 minute mile people right off the bat. I had a goal of 2:15 for this bad boy, which was a 10:17 minute mile. Miles 1 and 2 were quick and easy, tons of crowd support, looped back by the start so I got to see Chris several times through those first 2 miles too, and he just looked so happy for me, so happy for me, and so proud of me -- I'll never forget the way he looked at me the whole time I was running that blasted race. Miles 3 and 4 were getting more challenging, we were in the more industrial part of Indy, more boring, less support, and less reminder that we were in the actual race I had been training for. Miles5-9 were hell. Pure awful hell. NO (and I am SOOOOO not exaggerating) NO support, we were running through neighborhoods and the whole glob of people really spread out through here, so I was essentially running in a strange area, all by myself. Makes it really hard to do this kind of run. At mile 9 I decided to hit the water table, my first water stop EVER. More time should really be spent on explaining how these things work....... I tried to merge into the other runners, grab my cup and take a drink (or maybe 2) while running, then toss the cup elegantly to the ground. Somehow, chick-a-dee in front of me decided that her foot should wrap around my foot, and I fell, Right on my knee. I wound up walking most of mile 9 due to a throbbing knee, but mostly my wounded pride. At mile 10 I got a 2nd wind. I only had a mere 5K left. I was gonna finish this thing regardless. I was REALLY bummed that I had allowed myself to walk , but I thought I could just get over it and finish this thing. Somewhere in mile 10 I began pacing with another lady who was grunting her way through this, just like me :-) At the 11, I couldn't help it -- I was getting crazy excited, and SOOO very tired! I pushed through 11, and soon hit 12! At this point we could see the uuber-fast full marathon finishers going down their special lane......wow they were fast, and determined! Then I hit the 12, sweet, glorious 12! About 1 minute into the 12, Chris re-appeared!!! He says "c'mon baby, the finish is just around that corner" So, I assume I have blocked out a huge chunk of the 12th mile, and I am nearly done!!!! Turns out, he was a little off... the finish was a ways away still, but he did run beside me as best he could. He left me when he went on to get to the finish line so he could get a pic of me crossing it (he wound up missing it due to the barricades and such that were set up all over) That last mile was really rough. It was a sweet, sweet relief to hear the finish line. This was one of those runs where I could sense the finish with all 5 senses. I could taste it (or maybe that was dehydration), I could smell it (something about a bunch of sweaty people all blobbed up in one little space) I could hear it (the heavy breathing that comes after you run 13.1 miles) I could feel it (awesome bands playing at the finish line) and, my favorite, I could SEE it. I gave that last .17 mile my ALL..... I finished that thing stronger than any other run ever! I ran it in 2h25m15s. I was pretty bummed for a long, LONG time about that........ well, I am still bummed about it. Ultimately though, I am happy with my first 1/2 experience, and if I could change anything about it, I would have gotten more training runs, focusing on those long runs.

Popcorn Panic....5 mile run in Valpo

After the fun and success of the Frantic Frenzy -- we decided to take the summer off...... we were scared away by the hot weather, and, well, the lack of $$ certainly contributed to it as well. We signed up for a 5 mile run (EEEEEK) in early September, in Valparaiso, IN. It was part of the Popcorn Festival -- the run is called to Popcorn Panic. And we were in a panic --this was a huge run for us!!! I trained for it, and, you'll never guess who did not.
We arrived in Valpo on race morning feeling pretty nervous, we had a good idea what roads would be included (we are NOT the nerds who study and analyze the course maps --- gets our minds out of whack) and the roads we were thinking of were quite hilly..... this is no good for us, because we live in the flattest part of the universe. can't hill train in Wheatfield. period.
We had plenty of time (for once) and had a blast being that couple who was just standing around making fun of everyone else...... to date, we don't do much warm-up before races....we stretch. and laugh. a lot. I think it's better to be stress-free before a race, than to be all wound up and uuber-focused. I like my running to be fun.....
The first 2 miles were pretty fast and un-exciting (in a good way) the 3rd mile felt comfortable, and mile 4 wasn't too bad. mile 5 was. it was bad. There were hills. Not just hills, but I think Valpo had mountains shipped in and delivered to mile 5. awful. The finish was uphill, and a long, steep hill at that (now, don't go to Valpo looking for these hills, they had them removed immediately after we ran up them) I never thought we were gonna finish -- it was really tough. Chris darted by me at the exact finish, and he found his strong finish and nailed it! I just kept putzing my way up killer hill, and eventually crossed the finish line. After a quick drink, I felt amazing. I just ran 5 miles. Competitively. Wow -- what a rush!
Chris finished in 45m44s and I finished in 45m45s... what a close race!
But, if I just did 5 miles, what could be next................

Part 4: (Our first official race together)

Our next official race was to be May 30, 2009.... The Field Station Frenzy aka "Frantic Frenzy" We chose this race because it fits into my 'rules' All races must be A) within a 1 hour drive from home B) under $20 a piece (except for the big races) and C) if it has kid care -- we're IN!!! Well, this race had all 3!!! Now, having 4 children under 5 -- it is impossible for us to ever run together.... and at the time, Chris wasn't into doing any maintenance runs or training runs, period.... he likes to sprint around the yard -- and BLAM he's ready to race....... Anyhow -- I train and train for this 5K and I am really worried, this is a trail/pavement run.... try as I may, there is nowhere around me to trail-train..... so I find myself running in people's front yards on my runs :-( At about the beginning of May, I am feeling pretty confident, and even getting excited about the race. Now, mind you, I am a slow runner -- at the time I was averaging a 10 minute mile..... so I am not in this to WIN it, I just wanna do it!

Race day: We are ready... throw the kids in the van, and out the door we go. We get up there and see there is NOWHERE to park!!! Now this makes my (irrational) pre-race nerves go into overdrive!! I go to get the race packets while Chris and kids park the van, and long story short -- we finally find each other with about 7 minutes to spare before the race starts, and we STILL have to drop the kids off at kiddie care and line up!!!!! Fortunately this was NOT an USATF race, so it was really laid back and we had time to spare!!!
Once the race began, all I wanted to do was get back to those kids!!! The baby was screaming when we left, the 2 year old was bored before we got out of ear shot, the 4 & 5 year olds were hoping this would take all day!!!

The race starts, and we are on our way!! We rounded a bend in the trail and I could see Mr Dude with his stopwatch, and soon I could hear the time he was yelling out......when I got to him he said 8:56. I knew this guy needed help -- there is NO way in the world I just ran an 8:56 mile!!!! But, it was enough to stoke my running fire -- and I kept running a steady, solid race. At the 2 mile mark, I heard a 18:49 as I passed this Mr. Dude. Soon I saw the back of Mr Hotness (aka my hubby) so I steadfastly (well, maybe more like clumsily, but steadily) caught up to him just as he started walking. I yelled at him and told him there were 4 little faces wanting their mommy and daddy! He simply (and maybe a little grumpily) told me I better go get them!!! (uh, the nerve!)
I wound up running mile 3 with some guy who was just pacing off of me, and this made me feel like a "real" runner. When I came around the bend at mile 3, I could hear the cheering and just barely make out the red TH Timing run-through-timing-thingee..... and I was so happy, I felt SO good!!!! I knew I had lost some time, but I didn't care -- I felt great!!! After I finished, I tried to go get the kids and get back to the finish line in time for them to see Daddy cross, but we were too slow!
I finished in 29:49 and Chris finished in 32:01 -- I REALLY wanted to break the 29 minute mark, but oh well.... it was so much fun to run on that trail, I didn't even care!!!!

part 3

So, on the way home from 5K #1, Chris confesses that he is insanely jealous (OK, OK, I may exaggerate a lil bit) but he is jealous and he wants to run the next one with me... He had run a LOT in the army and National Guard, and this running doesn't involve a ruck-sack, so -- easy-peasy, right?!?!?!? We signed up for a 5K in early May. And I began to train. He didn't. Race day came, and he hadn't run a step since exiting the National Guard in 2002. This was gonna be fun!!!! Not like it was easy for me, but he seemed mostly OK through the first mile -- he did, after all, take off like a rocket, so I was behind him for a while...... then, at about the 1.25 mile mark, he slowed down. A lot. Then he walked. I passed him and was feeling OK. He walked/ran the remainder of the race, while I slowly ran it. Neither one of us did that great at all.... and the best part is, we didn't even get an official time b/c they used a stopwatch to time it and our bibs got lost..... blah, blah, blah --in short, it doesn't even factor into our 10,000 miles for a multitude of reasons.
And, Chris limped for a good, solid 3 days after the race. It was one of the funniest things EVER. He just HAD to be a bad-a$$ and not train.... and the poor thing was in pain for days..... heehee

How it began (part 2)

So, after signing up for the 5K, I immediately panicked.... this was a HUGE deal!! First of all, it cost $18!!!! (that's alotta $$ when you're really broke, have 4 kids, and your hubby JUST found a job after being laid off, but his new job brings home LESS than 1/2 what he used to make!!!) ANd, there was the fact that I was struggling to run 4 minutes on the treadmill!!!! But, I kept plucking away at the treadmill, and got myself up to 2 miles straight!!!!! In March, my running life changed. I hit the streets. My feet hit the pavement. Do you have ANY idea how much better (and HARDER) it was to run outside, instead of my safe lil treadmill????? My abs were sore for 3 days!!! Those poor stabilizer muscles had no idea how to keep me balanced AND run at the same time!!! I kept running outside, even in the crappy weather, because it was SO much more fun than my treadmill. I ran that first 5K in April. I corssed that finish line in 32:17 (ugh) and I saw the proud faces of my hubby, my 4 angels, and even my hubby's parents had come too!! It was truly an amazing experience!!!!

How it began.......

My whole life, I have wanted to be a runner.... not a "runner-runner" just a casual, 'yeah, I run a few miles a day' runner. I tried running as a kid, but didn't really ever stick with it. Tried running in college, but uhmmm, I'm REALLY self-conscious, and a college campus is NOT the place to 'prove' you can't run. Then I met Chris, and pretty quickly, we were married with a kid on the way!!! (no really, we started officially dating in November of 2001, and were married in September of 2002, and pregnant in November of 2002!!!!) And then, pretty much as soon as one baby tuned 1, we were pregnant with the next. So, in November of 2008, while nearing the end of my pregnancy with #4, I decided I was finally going to become a runner. I had turned 30 in August, and I wasn't getting any younger. So, Jillian was born on Nov 17, and on Nov 24, I hopped on the treadmill. And, I ran. A whole entire 2 minutes. Then, I collapsed on the bed grunting in pain. I grunted for 30 minutes. It was miserable. So, being a creature of habit -- and yes, after 1 day, running on the treadmill IS a habit, I got back on the treadmill. And I ran a whole nother 2 minutes. But, I didn't collapse. I just puked. This went on for weeks. After about 6 weeks, I could run an easy 3 minutes on the treadmill. On Jan 1 of 2009, I signed up for a 5K.
It wasn't until April 4th, so I had some time to get from 3 minutes to 3.1 MILES!!!!!!!!!